I finally got my divorce!

David and I eventually did get married. Yeah, I know, I was stupid. We were 23 and we got married on Christmas Eve 2007. We had originally planned on getting married the following September, but my mom forgetting who she was talking to brought up the idea of eloping. So of course we jumped on that idea. It would save us money and we didn’t have to worry about inviting anyone. Three weeks after we got married he decided he couldn’t be who he wanted to be. Meaning he couldn’t sleep with every woman under the sun. He left for a woman in Texas that he had never met in person.

          I fought with him for years to give me a divorce. I told him since I paid everything for us to get married he could pay for the divorce. I also told him how to get us divorced for free. He always had some excuse as to why he could not file the paper work. He didn’t want to remarry so he was in no rush, he had no time to go to the court house, or he forgot how I told him to do it for free. You name it, he had the excuse. The ex I moved away from would always yell at me for not being divorced and accusing me of wanting to stay married so I couldn’t marry him. That was not it at all; I just refused to fork out more money.

          Finally after moving back home I decided that I had ENOUGH of being married. I wanted my last name back. I wanted my divorce. I never felt married anyways. Three weeks is not long enough to feel married. I felt trapped. So when I was at court to try and get custody back of my son I went and picked up the papers for divorce and asked out I filed to get the fees waived since I am technically below poverty level.

          Within three weeks I had all the paper filled out and notarized. All I had to do was get back to the courtroom which was over an hour away and get everything filed. I told David that I had the papers ready to go so he offered to pick me up and drop the papers off. So we got to the court house, had everything checked, got the papers filed, and David was served right then and there. I called three weeks later to check on everything and they tell me there is no record at all of him being served. Are you kidding me? He got served in the lobby of the court house, by one of the Sherriff’s officers that were right there! So we had to wait until they could MAIL him the same papers he was handed. It took months, but we were finally going to court to get divorced!

          David also decided to not fight me for custody. We decided it was best to keep the custody out of the court room. For the first time in 8 years we were able to agree on what was best for our son. I was amazed. I also noticed that he was trying harder than he ever had to be a part of his sons life. I was amazed at how much he had changed just from him not being able to see his son for a year, since we moved out of state. I was proud of who he was becoming and I was happy to finally be divorced!

Get with it people! 21st Century.. not stone ages!

The Arguments against Gay Marriage

1.      Marriage is an institution between one man and one woman.

a.     It used to be, but now it is time to change this. Just because it was like that for 5,000 years does not mean the views on this cannot be changed.

2. Marriage is for procreation

a.     If this was true, then why are there so many men and women who are sterile?

3. Same-sex couples aren't the optimum environment in which to raise children. 

a.     Neither is a place with single mothers, but those children are doing just fine. Love is the most important part when it comes to raising children. As long as you love your child, teach them right from wrong, prepare them as best as you can for the “real” world then your child is going to be fine. Would you rather the child be raised by a happy family or a broken family? I chose happy.

4. Gay relationships are immoral and violate the sacred institution of marriage.

a.     No, what is immoral is taking away civil rights from a human being.

5. Marriages are for ensuring the continuation of the species.

a.     Wrong. It may be a major point in it, but marriage is for two people who are in love to live their lives together with the security that if anything happens to one person then the other is taken care of. There are many people who get married and NEVER have children; either because they cannot have children or they do not want children.

6. Same-sex marriage would threaten the institution of marriage.

a.     Divorce does that NOT same sex marriage!

7. We shouldn't alter heterosexual marriage, which is a traditional institution that goes back to the dawn of time.

a.     Then woman should not be allowed to vote, blacks should still be slaves, and Jews should still be persecuted. Times change, people change, laws change.

8. Same-sex marriage is an untried social experiment.

a.     Experiment? So wanting to be with the one you love forever is just an experiment? For what? Amusement?

9. Same-sex marriage would start us down a "slippery slope" towards legalized incest, bestial marriage, polygamy and all manner of other horrible consequences 

a.     In some states incest is already legal and you can marry your cousin and what about all the polygamy colonies?

10. Granting gays the right to marry is a "special" right.

a.     Having my foot up your ass is a special right, gay marriage is just a RIGHT.. period!

11. Churches would be forced to marry gay people against their will.

a.     There are enough churches out there that will do this willingly that those that don’t want to can get over it.

12. If gay marriage is legalized, homosexuality would be promoted in the public schools.

a.     It’s not legal yet and it is still being talked about in schools. All you need to do is turn on the tv and see homosexuality. Rock on Glee!

The real reasons people oppose gay marriage

1. Just not comfortable with the idea.

2. They fear that they are also gay.

Marriage is... Part #2

For the past few days I have been asking people on my pages and groups to tell me what marriage is to them. I am trying to bring awarness that when many people talk about marriage they do not ever say it is only between a man and a woman. I have two pages, my personal profile, and a group that I am involved in and asked everyone. A few days ago I posted my first marriage based post and am following up with this post here. Marriage is NOT just for a man and a woman, it is for everyone in love that wants to be marriage to their partner and spend the rest of their life with their partners. There are a few responses I did not include. Those responses were basically talking about how marriage is a death trap and the end of their life. Not needed, but also not talking about man/woman marriages either. Here are the responses I got when asking people to tell me what marriage is.

Marriage is….

·         Currently protected under law in the U.S. allowing only certain individuals to marry, which is unfair and unconstitutional.

·         The platform to a stronger bond with your partner for life, your security in that relationship and the ability to raise children in a protected household, all of which I am denied right now.

·         A sharing and commitment of 2 lives till death do you part!

·         The joy of waking up next to your best friend for the rest of your life and the sheer agony of waking up next to the SAME PERSON for the...no wait...just the first part. Oh sue me, I'm a satirist. ;)

·          A right to which all Americans should be entitled.

·         A beautiful union between 2 people who love each!!! No matter the gender of both!!!!

·         one of the ultimate expressions of love between 2 people

·         A union of 2 people who love each other and share common interests and goals and want to share a life together.....Maybe that's too simple in today's complicated world..

·         The physical and legal announcement of two people who love and have committed the rest of their lives to one another!

·         Marriage, plain and simple.

·         A commitment between two loving people.

·         An institution every human being should be entitled to.

·         Something humans have celebrated before any organized religion.

·         A commitment of love between two people regardless of gender.

·         My right

·         Over 1000 rights that on any given day take ordinary objects that weave a tapas try that becomes life!

·         For heterosexual couples marriage provides over 1,400 rights and benefits at a cost of $50.00 at your County Court House, however if you are LGBT it cost over $10,000 to have the proper paperwork completed by an attorney to protect each person involve in the relationship that isn't recognized by the State of Ohio.

·         something that I want to have someday

·         Finding that person who's vision you share and who's bad habits don't get on your nerves. :) It shouldn't be able to be determined by any government who that is!

Marriage is....

Today's blog post is a simple and to the point one. It is peoples personal definition of marriage along with a few pictures. I got the inspiration from MarriageEvolved. Nowhere in here will you see where marriage is one way and not the other.

Marriage is the Voluntary union of two adults, to the exclusion of all others, with the intention that it will endure for life.

Marriage is simply publicly saying 'back off, this one is mine'

Marriage is Loving one person unconditionally.. being there for that person always and forever. Loyalty honesty and support.

Marriage is Love and trust

Marriage is Tying your soul to the one person you couldn't imagine ever living your life without!

Marriage is Love

Marriage is forever!

Marriage is about love and only love.

Marriage is currently protected under law in the U.S. allowing only certain individuals to marry, which is unfair and unconstitutional.

Marriage is a beautiful union of mind body & soul when 2 people become one respecting loving sharing and accepting that it is always to be honest and true. Marriage is work you get paid what you put into it.

Marriage is a union of 2 people who love each other and share common interests and goals and want to share a life together.....Maybe that's too simple in today's complicated world..

Gay Rights Rally Dayton Ohio 2012

Today I had the most amazing day. I went to my very first Rally in support of Gay Rights. I met some amazing people and heard amazing speeches. I was not sure what to expect before I got there so I was imagining a million different things that could happen on the way up there. My best friend and I went together to meet up with another friend of ours. Alisha and Robb have been in my life longer than anyone else. I have known Robb for 20 years. I feel so old just saying that. He came out to me around 6 years ago. I was the last of his family and friends he had left to tell and at first I was really hurt that I was the last to find out. Then talking to him he told me it was because my opinion matter the most to him. I have always loved this guy as a friend and a brother. He is amazing.

Robb, Me, Alisha

I went to this rally in support of all of my LGBT friends. Robb, Jenna, Jakey, Adam, Stephen, and Azalea. I made even more friends in the community in the past month. I have started an ally page on facebook: GLBT&STR8 and have gotten to know people on MarriageEvolved on facebook as well.

I heard amazing speakers today. Jennifer Tyrrell is a mother who was playing an important role in scouting for her little boy. She was having a blast with it, then one day she gets a call that she was getting kicked out because she was a lesbian. Joshua Alan Snyder-Hill and his husband want to change their last name, but because their D.C. wedding means nothing to the State of Ohio they are being put through to ringer just to be told no in the end. Now does any of this sound fair? Hell no it doesn't! We are in the 21st century and we are still dealing with prejudice? We are still dealing with hate towards those who are different? I plan to use my voice towards the change.

Joshua speaking

One of the other speakers I have to quote him "I am sweating like Lindsay Lohan in a court room"

Not only did I hear amazing speakers I also got to witness seven same sex weddings. It was such a beautiful moment. One guy almost freaked out because he couldn't find he ring in his pocket. One couple I saw were staring so intensely into each others arms your could feel how powerful their love was through the entire crowd. I could not be more happy to be an ally to the LGBT community and I am going to share the pictures from this morning and some of the videos I can find. Also, go to www.change.com/scouts to sign the petition for Jennifer Tyrrell!

The seven weddings

It is the time for Change

The other day after voicing my support for the LGBT community I got a lot of harsh words said towards me. I was told that I was upsetting God by going against what he wanted and that I was a bad Christian. My words to them were that God wants us to love unconditionally and not judge. I am doing exactly what God wants me to do. 

I have strong opinions about a few things but I do not usually voice my opinion on it unless it is brought up in a conversation. Yet I could not just sit back and be quiet about this anymore. I have to many friends in the LGBT community and am making more. All I can think about it how unfair it is that they do not get to experience marriage the way I would. I recently found a list (2 years old) of rights that are denied to homosexual couples. I am going to share this list below. 

Here are some of the legal rights that married couples have and gays and lesbians are denied: 

1. Joint parental rights of children
2. Joint adoption
3. Status as "next-of-kin" for hospital visits and medical decisions
4. Right to make a decision about the disposal of loved ones remains
5. Immigration and residency for partners from other countries
6. Crime victims recovery benefits
7. Domestic violence protection orders
8. Judicial protections and immunity
9. Automatic inheritance in the absence of a will
10. Public safety officers death benefits
11. Spousal veterans benefits
12. Social Security
13. Medicare
14. Joint filing of tax returns
15. Wrongful death benefits for surviving partner and children
16. Bereavement or sick leave to care for partner or children
17. Child support
18. Joint Insurance Plans
19. Tax credits including: Child tax credit, Hope and lifetime learning credits
20. Deferred Compensation for pension and IRAs
21. Estate and gift tax benefits
22. Welfare and public assistance
23. Joint housing for elderly
24. Credit protection
25. Medical care for survivors and dependents of certain veterans

Even in the states that do allow same-sex marriages, most of the benefits of marriage do not apply, because the Defense of Marriage Act states that the federal government only recognizes marriage as "a legal union of one man and one woman as husband and wife".

Would someone like to explain to me how this is fair? Thank the Lord that President Obama has come out to express his voice on same sex marriage and is talking about repealing the Defense of Marriage Act. Even if the state allows same sex marriages it is not recognized at a federal level. After Obama spoke out there have been several celebrities to voice as well along with those that already did. Here is a small list of those celebrities:

Heidi Montag
Miley Cyrus
Britney Spears
Perez Hilton
Natalie Portman
Pete Wentz
Renee Zellweger
Ricki Lake
Robert DeNiro
Ang Lee
Anne Hathaway
Ben Affleck
Brittany Snow
Carmen Electra
Carson Kressley
Cyndi Lauper
Debra Messing
Dustin Lance Black
George Michael
Gillian Anderson
Hilary Duff
Hillary Clinton
Jake Gyllenhaal
Jamie Cullum
Jason Stuart
Jennifer Aniston
Jorja Fox
Katherine Heigl
Matt Lucas
Megan Mullally
Miss Coco Peru
Neil Patrick Harris
Pete Doherty
Pink
Queen Latifah
Quincy Jones
Rosario Dawson
Roseanne Barr
Rosie O'Donnell
Daniel Radcliffe
Ellen Degeneres
lily allen
angelina jolie
drew barrymore
elton john
Quincy Jones

Pauley Perrette

Brad Pitt

Alicia Silverstone

Meghan McCain

Kathy Griffin

Rose McGowan

Charlize Theron

Wanda Sykes

Robin Williams

Christopher Meloni

Rosie O'Donell

Adam Lambert

Katy Perry

Lily Akken

Jay Z

Tyra Banks

Ryan Seacrest

Alec bladwin

Lady Gaga

Russell Simmons

Kim Kardashian

Nicki Minaj

Al Sharpton

I Just wish that more people can see how this change needs to happen and how much it would mean to everyone. I pray that same sex marriage equality happens in this decade and I want you guys to pray with me. 

I had to get this off my chest

The quality of the video is not that great, I blame my laptop, but this is some shit that I had to get off my chest. I saw a video this morning and I will try to post it under mine that absolutely broke my heart. I cried so hard for this man that I do not even know because of what he had to go through. I cried for 20 minutes after the video ended. I want the bigotry to end, I want the freedom to be given, I want the change to be made! It is sad and depressing that so many people have such a fear and a closed mind for change. Yes, there is some change that I am afraid of, but this is a change that needs to happen. No, it is a change that MUST happen. For those of you out there please share this and spread it around. Get more people out there to see what taking away someone's rights does to them and those that love them. Help make the change that is needed!

This is my video blog

This is the video I refer to in my blog and video blog