I have one damn handsome child!

When I was younger I always wanted glasses because my parents wore glasses. I also wanted to be able to wear glasses just like Sally Jessy Raphael. At the ripe age of 7 I enjoyed watching her show and always wanted those huge, red, plastic framed, glasses. I thought they were the epitome of cool. I mean seriously, what is more cool than gigantic, red, glasses?

I ended up needing glasses when I was around 7 or 8. I couldn't see things on the board at school or what I was supposed to be doing in art or gym class. So my obvious first pair of glasses was red frames just like SJR. I wore them proudly and held my head so high. My next pair was red frames with confetti in them. I also got the matching blue pair. It wasn't until I got older that I really started hating, despising to be more correct, having to wear glasses. I couldn't wait until I could get contacts.

When I got pregnant with my son I prayed that needing glasses would skip over him. My entire family wore glasses and my ex-husbands family wears glasses, or really needs them, as well. Even though I never wanted my son to have to wear glasses I tried to make it seem like glasses were pretty cool, just in case he ended up needing them. Around the age of 5 he started begging me to buy him glasses so he could wear glasses like everyone else. I always thought that was pretty adorable, he would even get mad when I said no.

Then a few weeks ago I started to notice that he was blinking more than he used to. Not just the normal blinking, but the trying to get your eyes to focus blinking. So, when I went to order my contacts from my eye doctor I scheduled my son an appointment of his own. I was still praying that it was just allergies and not him needing glasses. Today at his appointment I was informed that my son needed glasses. Not that he needed to wear them every day, but at least while he was at school to help him see the board. My son was so excited to find out he needed glasses. He had been asking for years and he finally got what he wanted. I must say, my son looks damn handsome in glasses! It's just going to take a bit of getting used to seeing him with glasses on.

Ignore the weird lady in the background :)

What you say and how you say it really does matter.

You never really pay attention to what you are saying to your child, or how they are interpreting what you say, until they say something that makes you think or breaks your heart.

As most of you know my son is ADHD and has been on his medication for a while now, the entire school year, and that I typically don't give it to him on the weekends. However, when he has something going on, or we are going somewhere that he needs to be calmer for, I will give him his morning dose. I've never really paid attention to my choice in words when I tell him he needs to take it for that weekend day. I usually say something like "Take your medicine so you aren't all crazy." Then there are days where he is off he wall hyper, more than usual, and I say "Do I need to give you your medicine?"

My son has never indicated that I am choosing the wrong words when it comes to his medication. That is, until this morning. I almost forgot to give him his medication before I dropped him off at school. Thank God I carry extras of both of our daily medications in my purse for those "just in case" moments and this morning was one of them. I pulled the little medicine case out of my purse and before I even open it my son quickly says "I promise I will be good!" It took me a second to realize why he was saying it.

Without meaning to I was making my son feel like his medication was a punishment for acting extremely hyper due to his ADHD. It broke my heart! I never want him to feel like that! EVER! So I tried to explain to him that I know he can behave, but the medicine is meant to help him stay calm and focused in school so he can keep doing as great as he has been. That if we had known he needed the medicine to help him he wouldn't have gotten in so much trouble in the past years of school.

My son is perfect and his hyper ways are fine when he is at home. His medication is to help him in school and to help him stay calm and focused enough to succeed in school and do well. I pray that one day he gets to a point in his life where he no longer needs his medication and he can learn how to make his ADHD work for him and stay focused without it.  I really need to watch what I say and how I say it. My son should never feel punished for having ADHD or anything else that is completely out of his control!

I am slowly loosing my sanity

I love my sons sister like she was my own daughter and for a while there I was her stepmother. My son is the oldest of six kids. He has 3 younger sisters and a younger brother by his dad and a younger sister by me. Out of all of them he only gets to see his oldest younger sister. When my sons dad comes over every other Saturday to see him he will bring his oldest daughter with him. I love having his sister over here. She is a trip, just like my son, and my son really loves spending time with his sister. Every other Saturday is the only time my son gets to be the big brother he really is and he is a great big brother. Three weeks ago while at the park someone called his sister weird so my son replied with, "She is my sister so if she is weird then I am weird too." Truth be told, they are both weird, but that is why I love them. There is no denying that they are brother and sister when they are around each other.
For years my son has been practically begging me to have another child so he can have a sibling that lives with him. He has said that he wants to protect them and teach them things. Which I find amazing. I would love to have another child, but I have to finish college first and find someone that I will spend the rest of my life with. Someone who will be an amazing father to not only our child together but as a role model for my son as well. This day and age, that is hard to find. Anyways, back to the point of the blog:
Every other Saturday I question whether or not I really, really, really want a 2nd kid. Those are the days that my son and his sister are together in the house. Its great watching them be brother and sister, but they are both nuts when they are together lol. 
This past Saturday they couldn't agree on what to play with or what to do so my ex-husband and I took them to Half Priced books. Before we even got out the door my sons sister was saying she was hungry so her dad heated up a hotdog that I got for my son that he didn't eat and I said I was going to stop and get my son something to eat. So we get to McDonalds to get my son something and his sister, while shoving the hotdog in her mouth, is saying that she is still hungry, so her dad got her something as well. My sons sister finished her entire meal and then eats what my son didn't want to finish.
We get to the book store and they were ALL OVER the place. Then my sons sister proceeded to make me feel so damn old. In the car I told her that if her mom had an VCR I would buy her a VHS because they are only $0.50. I then spent 20 minutes trying to explain a VCR and VHS. Then she found the vinyls so I am explaining those to her. Then we were walking around looking for my ex-husband, who was in the bathroom, and my sons sister found books with the Beatles on the cover. She asked who "those guys" were and I *facepalmed* and told her they were the Beatles. She quickly replied with "Um, yeah, ok." Then she didn't want the tape she picked out anymore, she wanted a Barbie and my ex-husband told her no. So then my sons sister walks up to me and gives me the puppy dog eyes trying to get me to buy it for her and I said no. She looked at me like I was evil and walked away huffing and puffing. My son was just walking around following his sister driving her nuts by copying everything she was doing. I used to do that to my younger brother, what is more fun that irritating them by doing exactly what they are doing?
Then we stopped at Starbucks after we left the book store because my ex-husband just had to have his coffee and my sons sister saw cake pops but my ex-husband said no. My sons sister walks up to me, puts her arms around my waist, gives me a squeeze, looks at me with puppy dog eyes and says "I really want the pink thing." I reminded her that her dad said no so she went "UGGH!" and walked away lol. Both my son and his sister had to touch everything in the store regardless of how many times myself or my ex-husband told them to stop touching things. My ex-husband and I manage to get them to sit down while we wait for our drinks, which was a challenge all in its own. My son got a hot chocolate and didn't like it so his sister, who swore she hated hot chocolate, downed the entire thing. I bought them a biscotti to share and said if one of them didn't like it then the other one got the whole thing. My sons sister then continued to ask my son if he liked it or not so she could have all of it. After about five minutes we get the kids back in the car and head back home and my son and his sister were playing together in the back seat being normal brother and sister. But then my ex-husband tells me that he is hungry and to stop at McDonalds AGAIN to get him something to eat. My sons sister chimes in from the backseat that she is hungry again. *facesteeringwheel*
I love my sons sister and love having her here while she and my ex-husband spend time with my son. It also makes me happy that her mom doesn't mind my sons sister spending time here every other Saturday (might help that we have known each other since 6th grade). My son loves having his dad and sister here. But I seriously question how badly I want a second child. Then I remember. If, IF, I have a second kid they will not be 10mo about, they will most likely be 10yr apart, and that I can handle.

My son and his sister playing outside. Don't let this fool you, they were arguing over what to do, stay there or go to the park

 

Being a single mom is hard enough without having a bunch of crap to do!

Being a single mom is not an easy job. Most days I go to sleep with my feet dragging because I am so exhausted after staying awake to get as much as I can done when Booger goes to sleep. I am lucky though because we live with my dad and I don't have to worry about bills, but not having Boogers dad helping out means I am in charge of everything when it comes to Booger.

Then you have those rare days where you have nothing to do and your kid is at school so you cram in as many errands as you can before they get home from school. Yesterday was one of those days. From 8am until 4pm I spent 2 hours and 9 minutes driving 80.0 miles all over Gods green Earth doing my errands, picking Booger up from school, and taking him to his appointment. By 3pm my legs were so pissed at me they were refusing to function properly and my brain was asleep even though I was up walking and driving around. Next time I will not cram this much crap into one day. I will share with you the map I made of my day and the list of things I did below it.

For safety reasons you will see a lot of black marks, I blacked out city names and highway numbers. Just pay attention to the blue lines and the letters. Here we go!! Oh yeah, you can't see a lot of the letters because there was more than one stop in those areas....

A- Home (7:45am)
B- Boogers school (8am)
C- My school, to print off stuff for my research paper (8:45-9:22am)
D- Eye Dr to talk to them about my contacts (10:00am)
E- Payless to return a pair of shoes (10:25am)
F- My brothers to drop off something for my sister in law (10:50am)
G- FOOD!! (11:05-11:22am)
H- Post Office to mail home made cards to be sent to a soldier over seas (11:30am)
I- JCP to pick up pictures and hobby store to get something for Booger. They are in same strip (11:35-12:15pm)
J- Walmart to exchange something (12:40pm)
K- Pharmacy to pick up prescription for Booger (1:05pm)
L- Home for 20min before Booger gets out of school (1:22pm)
M- Boogers school to pick up for early dismissal (1:45pm)
N- Home for 30 min before Boogers appt (2:00-2:35pm)
O- Boogers appt with social worker (3:00-4:00pm)
P- FINALLY! Home for the day! (4:18pm)

Don't Doubt the Mommy!

Today was the first day in a long time that Boger has let me read to him. He is not big on reading or being read to. He hates most books I try to read to him. He also refuses to suggest books to read or let me suggest any for him. So I was quite happy when he let me read to him for 30 minutes before he went to bed.

For months I have been trying to get him to read the Percy Jackson and the Olympians series. I read all the books a few months back and went out of my way to tell him how cool the books were and how much better than the movie the first one was. He refused to believe me or give me a chance to read some of it to him.

However, today when we saw his social worker I mentioned that a few weeks ago he started having a hard time letting me leave the room when he was going to sleep. He will grab onto me and refuse to let go while basically pleading me to stay in the room with him. I would love to, but I can't get school work done when he is awake and do it after I get him in bed. So his social worker suggested that 30 minutes before bedtime he curl up on the couch with me while I read to him and surprisingly Booger agreed.

I don't have any books for him since he sold them all at the book store so I grabbed The Lightening Thief and sat down on the couch. Booger was not happy when he saw the book, but I told him that was all I had and tomorrow we can go to the library and find some that he will be interested in. So Booger curls up next to me and just sits back while I start reading.

I finish the first chapter and close the book to get Booger in the room and in bed. He BEGGED me to read the next chapter. Puppy dog eyes and pouting. He just HAD to find out what happened next. So I read the second chapter. More puppy dog eyes and more pouting. I told him I would read two chapters tomorrow night and after a few more minutes of puppy dog eyes he said the book was interested and better than he thought it would be and he couldn't wait until tomorrow night to find out what happened next.

So this is what I have to say to Booger:

Dear child,

When Mommy reads a book and says you will like it you must believe me. For MONTHS you have been saying that Percy Jackson and the Olympians is so stupid and you didn't even like The Lightening Thief movie. So why would you want to read the book? For MONTHS I have been telling you the books are freaking awesome.

Today we talk to your social worker and he gets you to promise to try reading with me for 30 minutes before bedtime to help you fall asleep. I had no other books for your age except those so I chose to read it to you. You were not happy about that.

I finish chapter one, you beg me to read chapter two. I read chapter two you beg me to read chapter three. I tell you I will read it tomorrow and you get mad because, and I quote, "I like being able to hear you read it and picture it in my head! I want to know what happens!"

Mommy-1 Booger-0

Believe me when I say you will like the damned book and just save face next time!!!

BOO YA!!

Love,
Mommy