For a while now my son has been telling me that he wants a brother or sister that lives with him. He is technically an only child since he is my only child, but he is also biologically an older brother to 4 little sisters and a little brother. He only gets to see one of his sisters every other weekend. The rest of his siblings he has no relationship with at all and I don't see it happening anytime in the foreseeable future either. He wants me to hurry up, meet someone, get remarried, and have another kid. I would love to be able to have another child, but school comes first. I have come nowhere near meeting the right guy to have another child with. Probably because I am really not putting any effort into meeting guys right now. School takes up the morning and I have no transportation in the evening. Yeah I could probably meet a guy at school, but I am not interested in any of the ones in my classes and I don't go where most of the students hang out (the cafeteria).
I also do not go to bars anymore. Even if I did my Mr. Right would not be sitting in the bar at night getting plastered. There are PLENTY of bars where I live. Hell I can walk out my building and see one at the end of the parking lot and there are two more within 4 blocks. I think there are around 8-10 bars just within 1 mile of my apartment. I am also not the type of person to flirt with a complete stranger in the grocery store. Although, I have had my eye on this guy that works at the deli for almost a year now, but other than telling him what I want I don't say anything to him.
Living in this town I get a daily reminder that I am divorced and single as well. I have mentioned this before in a past blog, I live in Bridal Central. people travel from all around the country to wedding shop here. This brings me to the reason I started writing this blog. Every time I get stopped at a light and look at the wedding dresses I point out the ones in the window that I like and my son tells me what he thinks about it too. Then, about a few months ago, he makes me promise that he and I both agree on the dress I will wear. If I like it but he doesn't then I can't wear it. If he likes it but I don't I can't wear it. It just so happens that the other day we both found one that be both liked. So two days later when I passed the store again I pulled out my phone to take a picture of it, but it was no longer in the window. My son was crushed. He wants me to take pictures of all the ones we like so when I am finally ready to get married again we have pictures of the types of dresses to look for.
I think it is amazing that my son wants me to get remarried and have another kid. I also think it is amazing that he wants to take part in the planning part of it. However, I feel like I am letting him down because I am still single. When the times comes the time comes, but I am not going to go out of my way to make it happen.
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